Take this anchor from my heart!

Welcome back, darkness.

You're so familiar, having you around is just wonderful. All beyond words. I know there's still something missing to make me feel comfortable. A lack of something I didn't think I'd ever come to miss. Perhaps it's just this one thing that's so special about it all. How strange is the idea of always being alone at some point, of always having to do certain steps on your very own? For me, nothing's harder than realising such obvious facts. And yet, I may still be wrong about them anyway.
How would I know. See you soon.

Man kan inte ha det som inte betalas.

It took me so long to find out it's right there in front of me,
too close to see...

I am finally back to normal. These are some tiny stones I picked up at the beach a couple of days ago. I just thought they were pretty so I arranged them on a bigger stone. Well, obviously so. Guess that's what I look like on the inside now, if that makes any sense. Complete in a way, shattered in another. I didn't sleep last night and I went back home very early so I could witness the sunrise - that's something I hadn't done in quite a long time. I did miss that, it's still one of the most beautiful things I've seen so far. Made me very happy and sad at the same time. I had almost forgotten about being able to experience such a wide array of emotions, all at the same time. Crying both from joy and profound sadness came pretty close to a blissful moment. It's different from anything I've been able to feel the past months. Several loved ones passed away or just turned their backs and I wasn't able to cry over them. Now I'm starting to feel anger and pain again and I guess that's a good thing. So welcome back, all of you positive and awfully negative emotions. I am alive!